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From a Kayfabe Perspective: How is Braun Strowman Not WWE Universal Champion?

9/1/2016

 
Hooray, hooray for Kevin Owens they all say. Well, I say nay.

You all know the backstage, political, and creative decisions behind Kevin Owens winning the Universal Championship and his predecessor Finn Balor for that matter. However, from a real perspective - a viewpoint that is reckless to have while watching wrestling - how in the world is Braun Strowman not the champion of the universe right now?
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Replace "local competitor Johnny Knockout" with any main-event wrestler and you'll have the same conclusion.
The colossal giant is unbeatable. We've seen him act as Bray Wyatt's immovable muscle and, recently, set out on a path of destruction on his own. He's stood tall against fellow monsters like Big Show and Kane, without difficulty. He's avoided being pinned or submitted since debuting.

He's commissioned a devastating reverse chokeslam to annihilate the scared local competitors Stephanie McMahon and Mick Foley of the Raw brand place in front of him. If he ever faces adversity - a highly doubtful event - he can always cinch in his signature standing triangle choke to incapacitate his opponents .

So, if he's so unstoppable, why is his current competition only nobodies and not main roster stars? Why was Braun passed up not once but twice in two Universal Championship tournament fatal four-way matches? He's not even allowed to fight low-card wrestlers like Sin Cara (who he would kill with one punch, mind you). Is the Raw commissioner and general manager worried that Braun would rinse through popular stars like Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins?

He wasn't even considered when the Universal Championship was vacated or when its first champion was to be determined. If wrestling is real, which is what wrestling tries to portray itself as, then Braun is the best fighter and should be champion. Not even acknowledging the fact that he would eviscerate all of WWE's main-event stars, including Brock Lesnar, is an admittance that wrestling is predetermined, and he wasn't chosen because he can't sell tickets and can't cut a promo. 

Now, obviously in 2016, everyone watching Raw knows it's not real, but, damn it, don't be so on the nose about it. Strowman is a powerhouse, and, if this were any other time in wrestling, he might just be champion right now. Perhaps, Strowman needs to start doing flips and wrestle twenty minutes to gain management and fans' support.

So you tell me, from a kayfabe perspective, how is Braun not the Universal Champion right now?
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Please explain, you smarks.

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  • Pro Wrestling
  • Shows
  • Movies
  • Social
    • Twitter
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  • Writers
    • Charlie Groenewegen
    • Eric Martinez
    • Jacob Stachowiak
    • Josh Rushinock
    • Kevin Berge
    • Marc Yeager
    • Paul McIntyre
    • Ryan Frye